Below are the 3 most recent journal entries recorded in acts_of_madness' LiveJournal:

Wednesday, July 29th, 2009
12:26 pm	The Dark Times Shall Pass ...maybe. So, I've just had the most devastating moment of my life so far and am having a crap of a time getting back up from there. I guess when you've planned your whole life around a certain event and it doesn't happen, despite your faith and certainty that it would, it might be a little tough to see which way up is. I hurt. More than that, I am hollow inside because the babies that I have been pouring my love into since I was around 16 or 17 have failed. I have failed to conceive after coming to grips with being infertile anyway and finding miracles to be able to afford just the one try. Now Jon expects me to be patient and try again in a couple of years. YEARS!?! We've already been doing this for years. Years and years, so I don't know what he expects me to do until then. I don't even want to care anymore. I don't want to feel sad, I don't want to FEEL. But, it goes on, doesn't it? I don't know why but on it goes. Now I have to figure out how to make things matter again. (Comment on this)
Wednesday, September 7th, 2005
8:09 pm	hmm. ok, so I start a journal with the world is changing and weeks later one of the greatest american cities is devastated. that sucks. sometimes I hate being a disaster person. I watch and wait for crappy things to happen and when they do... part of my changing times is based on the recovery from those disasters. I've been waiting for something to happen so that I can escape my plain ole life and now it has. know what? I'm scared shitless that I'll be called. terrified that I'll be one of the ones contacted to disrupt my normal safe nine to five job to go help clean up the mess. by the same token, I'm afraid that I won't be contacted. what kind of nonsense is that? I have a friend who has offered to fund the adventure if I am called. I won't delay, I'll go. But I'll still be scared. what if I can't do it well! what if something devastating happens to ME while I'm there... sometimes I forget that I'm eternal. Current Mood: scared Current Music: Never. In my freedom there's just my thoughts (Comment on this)
Monday, August 8th, 2005
5:24 pm	This time The time is here. Pay careful attention because something great is about to happen in this little insignificant life. Blech! Insignificant! Mwa! that's the thing I desire to be least of all... but time are changing! (Comment on this)